(Funny quotes) Cleavage A Girls Best Friend

August 30th, 2009 admin Posted in comedy |

By Alejandro Heels

Cleavage A Girls Best Friend

They say “Diamonds are a girls best friend”, I would contest this and vigorously contest it. Cleavage is what a girl wants most, Cleavage is worshipped by men and rightly so in my honest opinion, Cleavage is envied by other girls, I suspect that of the two, envy, might be forermost in a girls mind when wishing for a cleavage, though I would’nt dare express this suspicion in such an open forum as the internet and it is probably a close run thing. I am not casting aspersions, I think it is common sense, in both, these modern times, where beauty and sex appeal are so worshipped and throughout history, Cleavage is a tool and a beautiful tool at that, men want as much as they can get in the downstairs department and I am certain, that this is seen as a status symbol just like a stunning cleavage in a girls world.

Diamonds might cause envy in girls but it does not attract the attention of men, unless they are jewel thieves and I think this is unwanted attention, attention from men might come second to envy from other girls but it is the reason a girl wants a fabulous cleavage, diamonds can wait!!!, diamonds will not get doord opened by salivating males, diamonds will not guarantee a driving test pass, diamonds will not get you on the ladder to success in Hollywood, diamonds will not keep a man. A perfectly formed cleavage will do all these things and more, so much more, girls with a beautiful cleavage dont wait in line, they dont buy drinks or meals, girls with cleavage, in most cases, have an easier passage in this world, cleavage gets a girl what she wants, diamons too but I sense this could be considered akin to a man, paying a lady of the night, to get what he wants, its far better to attain satisfaction without dipping into ones pockets.

Diamonds are forever, I can’t disagree with Shirley Williams and I dont think I would want to, Shirley had both in abundance. Cleavage is not forever, unless surgery is contemplated and surgery should not be contemplated to lengthen the life of a cleavage, it just looks wrong and is wrong, in my humble yet correct opinion. A sensational cleavage, though, can, in most cases, allow the attainment of diamonds, which is nice, for some, diamonds can allow for the attainment of cleavage but as we have discussed, it is not the perfect circumstance.

Diamonds are the cause of much strife in many African nations, cleavage normally, only causes strife in local pubs and sometimes in one to one relationships, the strife caused by diamonds or cleavage is not on an equal footing, when the suffering of African communities is considered, though I think that some cleavages could cause universal strife if used correctly.

To conclude my thoughts on this topical subject, I would just like to add, that I, as a member of the male sex, thoroughly enjoy cleavage, in all it’s glory always have done from cradle to present situation and each cleavage is unique and worth its weight in gold, I have been an admirer of every cleavage I ever laid eyes on, as I think all men are and I cannot thank our creator enough, for this fantastic distraction from matters of a much less important nature, like financial crisis or Christiano Ronaldo, so in conclusion diamond though indeed valuable, come second best, to both girls and boys in the friendship department, you can keep your diamonds, jewels and precious stones, I want cleavage, though probably for different reasons than a girl would.

The author of this madness, refuses to allow his recent lobotomy to hold him back, despite all adversities, he continues with his website, doctors advocate sedation but he is adamant he can succeed. http://www.heelsncleavage.com

Comedy podcasts with ventriloquist comedians

By Garrett36 Pierson36

Many podcasts are available to subscribe to and watch

in a variety of genres, and one of these is the comedy and ventriloquist comedian

podcast. Every small scale wannabe writer has a chance

to become a comedian through podcasting, since the

low entry cost allows people to start podcasting with

minimum effort and money. To find some of these

comedy podcasters, check a podcast directory. A

podcast directory is a listing of many, sometimes

several thousands, of podcasts submitted and divided

into categories. A podcast directory will probably have

a large number of comedy podcasts available to

subscribe to.

These comedy podcasts are usually created by a small

team of people who do the work in their free time, as a

hobby, not as a source of income. Because it is a hobby,

they’re more willing to give the work away for free, for

nothing more than recognition, probably in the hopes

they can parlay that recognition into a more mainstream

job. Some more corporate groups also put together

comedy podcasts, however. The satirical comedy web

site TheOnion.com puts out a regular comedy podcast,

featuring readings from their fake news site.

Placing a comedy podcast on the Internet has several

advantages for the creators. They get to showcase their

work, easily distributing their art to many people. This

following is likely to be be unusually passionate,

following the artist with more enthusiasm than the

artist’s average audience. The comedian has a chance to

be more open with the audience, engaging in a sort of

dialogue with them. The comedian broadcasts the files,

which enter the computer of the user, already a more

personal level than simply hearing the jokester on the

radio or on television. Compedy podcast subscribers

will often then write back to the podcaster, or leave

comments on the blog which often accompanies a

podcast site. This can give them a degree of input and

connection with the writers of the comedy podcast that

is far removed from other styles of comedy distribution.

The writers and producers of a comedy podcast thus

benefit from several advantages of the podcast form. It is cheap and easy to set up, and uses a distribution mechanism that is also easy to use. The way the podcast form is designed, as well, creates greater connection between the producer and the subscribers. The comedy writer has a greater ability to interact with the subscribers and to find out what they appreciate or do not. Because podcasting is so simple to get involved in, requiring only a small investment to get started, many amateur comedy writers have begun starting their own shows and distributing the feed. It is likely, because of

the unique connection podcasting offers between writer and listener, that we will see at least some of these amateur comedians make the leap to the professional stage. So, if you want to listen something realy fun, find a good ventriloquist comedian related podcast :).

Martin Ashton is the owner of Ventriloquist Comedian, where you can find good comedians. Also, magician, juggler and clown show. For more information visit http://ventriloquistplace.info

Movie Reviews reviews All the days before tomorrow

By Mr D Stevens

This is a lovely romantic movie interspaced with intriguing dream like scenarios.

It tells the story of a young man Wes played by Joey Kern and his strange relationship/friendship with a vibrant and lovely girl Alison played by the superb Alexandra Holden(Friends, Friday Night Clubs) you literally can’t help but fall in love with her zest for life, she literally steals your heart in every scene and no doubt that of Wes,
who although he wants more from the relationship, she just wants to be friends.

We join the movie with Alison with her boyfriend in Tokyo, there is a look of possible sadness/regret as she lays in his arms. One thing is clear, you don’t see that look when she is with Wes.

Alison phones Wes and tells him she wants to pay him a visit even though it is 2 a.m. At first you don’t understand why Wes is reluctant or hesistant for her to come over and pay him a visit. It is all explained in the flash back sequences, which strangely begin with “Not today,” and their previous back packing trips across New Zealand and Australia.

Their conversations are always intriguing, and funny, even mundane things such as watermelons have a comic edge, many in the first steps of a new relationship are sure to identify. You can literally sense the spark between them, and you kind of wonder as the lead actress Alison wonders
if she is truly satisfied simply being just friends. At one of the rare serious moments in the film, she mentions she would like to have children, to which Wes mentions “With me”? She laughs it off and says she doesn’t want to spoil what they have, she is sorry she can’t offer anything more.

I must admit towards the end do some of the flashback sequences come full circle, and it is a rare romantic movie many will identify with and cherish.

Mr D Stevens is a reviewer at Movie reviews

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