Cleavage (practical jokes) A Girls Best Friend

October 1st, 2009 admin Posted in comedy |

By Alejandro Heels

Cleavage A Girls Best Friend

They say “Diamonds are a girls best friend”, I would contest this and vigorously contest it. Cleavage is what a girl wants most, Cleavage is worshipped by men and rightly so in my honest opinion, Cleavage is envied by other girls, I suspect that of the two, envy, might be forermost in a girls mind when wishing for a cleavage, though I would’nt dare express this suspicion in such an open forum as the internet and it is probably a close run thing. I am not casting aspersions, I think it is common sense, in both, these modern times, where beauty and sex appeal are so worshipped and throughout history, Cleavage is a tool and a beautiful tool at that, men want as much as they can get in the downstairs department and I am certain, that this is seen as a status symbol just like a stunning cleavage in a girls world.

Diamonds might cause envy in girls but it does not attract the attention of men, unless they are jewel thieves and I think this is unwanted attention, attention from men might come second to envy from other girls but it is the reason a girl wants a fabulous cleavage, diamonds can wait!!!, diamonds will not get doord opened by salivating males, diamonds will not guarantee a driving test pass, diamonds will not get you on the ladder to success in Hollywood, diamonds will not keep a man. A perfectly formed cleavage will do all these things and more, so much more, girls with a beautiful cleavage dont wait in line, they dont buy drinks or meals, girls with cleavage, in most cases, have an easier passage in this world, cleavage gets a girl what she wants, diamons too but I sense this could be considered akin to a man, paying a lady of the night, to get what he wants, its far better to attain satisfaction without dipping into ones pockets.

Diamonds are forever, I can’t disagree with Shirley Williams and I dont think I would want to, Shirley had both in abundance. Cleavage is not forever, unless surgery is contemplated and surgery should not be contemplated to lengthen the life of a cleavage, it just looks wrong and is wrong, in my humble yet correct opinion. A sensational cleavage, though, can, in most cases, allow the attainment of diamonds, which is nice, for some, diamonds can allow for the attainment of cleavage but as we have discussed, it is not the perfect circumstance.

Diamonds are the cause of much strife in many African nations, cleavage normally, only causes strife in local pubs and sometimes in one to one relationships, the strife caused by diamonds or cleavage is not on an equal footing, when the suffering of African communities is considered, though I think that some cleavages could cause universal strife if used correctly.

To conclude my thoughts on this topical subject, I would just like to add, that I, as a member of the male sex, thoroughly enjoy cleavage, in all it’s glory always have done from cradle to present situation and each cleavage is unique and worth its weight in gold, I have been an admirer of every cleavage I ever laid eyes on, as I think all men are and I cannot thank our creator enough, for this fantastic distraction from matters of a much less important nature, like financial crisis or Christiano Ronaldo, so in conclusion diamond though indeed valuable, come second best, to both girls and boys in the friendship department, you can keep your diamonds, jewels and precious stones, I want cleavage, though probably for different reasons than a girl would.

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The author of this madness, refuses to allow his recent lobotomy to hold him back, despite all adversities, he continues with his website, doctors advocate sedation but he is adamant he can succeed. http://www.heelsncleavage.com

Movie reviews Bedtime stories

By Mr D Stevens

This is a great family movie, with some hilarious moments all the family will enjoy.

It stars Adam Sadler(Don’t mess with the Zohan) as Skeeter Bronson a hotel handyman whose father previously ran the hotel but has been swallowed up by a conglomerate headed by Richard Nottingham played by Barry Griffiths(Venus, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix) Skeeter although promised a long time ago by Barry Nottingham that he would manage the hotel on account of his father by Marty played by Jonathan Pryce(Pirates of the Caribbean),, unfortunately that promise has not come to fruition, as well as his manual duties he is looked down upon by the antagonist Kendall played by the dependant Guy Pearce(Death defying acts).

The good news for Skeeter is gets to babysit his adorable nephew and niece Bobbi and Patrick respectively, played by Laura Ann Kesling and played by Jonathan Morgan Heit who have made a wish, and the wish is whatever story he reads to them somehow some of that story comes to pass, in Skeeter’s life.

This is where the uniqueness of this movie comes into play, as you keep wondering what could happen, as does Skeeter when he realises whatever story they make him read come to pass. Things are complicated when the regular baby sitter Jill played by the lovely Keri Russell with very warm eyes(Mission Impossible: III), as inevitably Skeeter starts to fall for her, and she for him albeit his first impressions didn’t go down so well, Skeeter hopes to manipulate the bedtime stories to his benefit, but as usual in this realm things never quite go to plan.

It is a great family movie, all will find bits to enjoy.

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Mr D Stevens is a reviewer at Movie reviews

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